Finally Finished Harry

Yep, I finished the last Harry Potter book. I have to give Rowling credit: Not only did she tie up the whole thing, she even tied all seven of the books together. Pretty impressive.

I heard of going blind...

(hat tip to YarravillePaul)

Seventh Anniversary

Well, today is the seventh anniversary of ordination. I really don't know how I feel about this. I sometimes feel like I should just pitch the whole church thing and then I get weekends like last weekend and the one before. Weekends where being in the pulpit was a pleasure and felt like home. I would take that as a sign but then there are the week days of despair. Oh well. There is another congregation on the horizon that sounds good. I sent my stuff off today. I hope to hear from them soon.

Peace to you all and hope your summer is going well.

My Own Private Hell

I keep running into things that remind me about what was happening a year ago. Because of the way the church year runs, I am dealing with the anniversaries of the writing and sending of The Letter, my final sermon, and the seventh anniversary of my ordination all at the same time.

Last year they were somewhat spread out, but this year they are all almost right on top of each other. I was going to save my sermon for this week and realized that I couldn't save it as pentecost 9 because there was already one there. When I checked what else was pentecost 9, I came face to face with the last sermon I gave to my former congregation.

A year has already passed.

There is a line from the song What About Me by a one-hit wonder band called Moving Pictures which kind of sums up what I am feeling:

And now I'm standing on the corner, all the world's gone home
Nobody's changed, nobody's been saved
And I'm feeling cold and alone
I guess I'm lucky, I smile a lot
But sometimes I wish for more than I've got...

Maybe I expected too much from my leaving. Maybe I expected change that will never come. Maybe I expected affirmation that will never come. Maybe I expected justice from an unjust system.

The sermon for this Sunday is about prayer, especially the Lord's Prayer. And I will be standing in front of a group of people telling them how they need to be patient and wait on God. That God will give them what they need when they need it.

Preacher, preach to thyself!

It Is All Our Fault!

(Hat tip to Good as You)

The Free Fair - Take Two

Nick and I went to the Ionia Free Fair last night. It was a good time, but not quite as fun as last year. I think part of it was in not doing some of the weird things like going to the freak show. First off, the freak show was not there this year, and even so, you can only go to a freak show for the first time, once. I guess that goes beyond saying, but once you have seen it, it kind of loses something.

But it was fun. We went to Big Boy again, like last year. We didn't get yelled at by the people telling us that Jesus has a bank account, though.

On a different subject, this has happened to Nick and me and it kind of drives me nuts. This would be flipping people off.

Ok, I got flipped off by someone coming out of a driveway. Now, why would you want to flip someone off who now knows where you live and you have no idea where that person lives? I have been tempted to place a note on the person's car saying, "So you flipped me off? I know where you live, do you know where I live?" A little panic never hurt anyone. :-)

The second situation was when Nick got flipped off by a person driving a car with a business advertised on the side. What a great form of advertising! If we would have been on top of it, we would have taken the number and called.

Oh well.

If you are going to flip someone off, make sure you cannot be tracked.

HARRY DIES AT THE END!

Or not!

I DON"T KNOW BECAUSE I HAVE NOT READ THE BOOK YET!

And even if I did know, I wouldn't tell you because I wouldn't want to spoil the surprise.

I am looking forward to reading the book and finding out what happens to the really cute wizard, but in some way it is a little bit bittersweet. There was something about not having the story finished. There is something about getting to "know" this "person" who seems to always overcome adversity. Maybe with the place I am in my life, I need someone like Harry.

Actually, I hope Harry lives. It would be sad to think that evil could overcome him.

Hey, Harry survived the Fundamentalist's attempt to kill him! If he can survive the fundamentalists he can certainly survive Voldamort!

CAN WE SURVIVE IN A POST-HARRY WORLD!

Little Gifts From God

As I write this, I am sitting outside trying to compose a sermon for this Sunday. The gospel reading is about Mary and Martha and being too busy to notice what is important.

As if to reinforce the lesson, three fledgling blue jays have come to my pond. They surprised me because the first landed on a chair not more than three feet from where I was sitting. Then they proceeded to fly around, sometimes flying under the patio umbrella! It was as if they didn't know that people were something to be afraid of.

They were also landing on the rocks of the pond and drinking from the waterfalls.

I have never seen a fledgling blue jay, let alone one that close!

I guess it was time to stop being busy and notice what is important!

Pond Watch

I have not posted a pond watch in a long time.

I am sorry to say, I think all of the "special" fish are gone. You may remember that I had some fantail comets in the pond and two koi. Well, one of the fantails ended belly-up in the pond. Then the other one did not come out when I threw food in the pond. Now the coy are not coming out for lunch. I think they may have become lunch themselves. Tis a sad day in pond land.

This Just In! I have seen the two koi! They are alive!!

I'm Luna Lovegood, or is that Albus Dumbledore?

You're dreamy and absent-minded, though you often show startling intelligence. Sometimes you're Luna Lovegood, Harry's spacy acquaintance; at your best, you're Hogwarts headmaster Albus Dumbledore, far more serious-minded than your behavior might imply.

Who are you? Check it out here!

Back In Michigan

This is Nick, Me, and my friend Beth of Betty and the Headlights.

Well, Nick and I are back in Michigan! And I am happy to say that everything went well. Not that I was expecting my parents to be all weird or anything. I mean, I probably had one of the easiest times coming out of anyone I know.



I drug Nick around to all the things I love to do when I am home. Well, actually, not all the things, some of things there just was not enough time for.


We got into town and one of the first things I did was take Nick on Rush St. Rush St. is appropriately named: You drive down one hill and then up another. As you crest the hill, all that you see is the bluffs of the Illinois side of the Mississippi which are over a mile away. You are also about 200 feet above the river below. It is kind of freaky and you want to make sure you have good brakes!





We also checked out the city from the Fenlon Street Elevator. The elevator is a cable car system that lifts you 187 feet up the bluffs at an 87 degree angle. It is fun. Also a bit scary considering the elevator is about 120 years old.







The next day, Nick and I went to The Field of Dreams. It still amazes me that the movie has been out for over 18 years and there still was a crowd of people there. I guess it was true; it was built and they are still coming!







W went to U.S. Grant's Home in Galena, IL afterward and went shopping in Galena. Galena is a great little town in Illinois. It was the town of Chisholm, MN in the movie Field of Dreams. For those who are familiar with Michigan, it is kind of like Saugatuck but not quite as gay friendly.

This picture was actually one that was owned by U.S. Grant. I thought it was wild that it depicted children smoking. We debated exactly what it was the children were smoking! In many ways, Victorian sensibilities were much different than today! A painting like this would not be tolerated today.

Various family members just happened to "drop by" to see me (and to check out Nick!). But everyone was very nice. All in all, it was a good trip! Not enough time, but is there ever enough time?

On Sunday, we went to the Dickeyville Grotto. This is something that is probably not worth a trip in its own right, but a "Don't Miss!" if you are in the area. It was built by one priest (who must have been VERY bored!) many moons ago. It is impressive, but mighty cheesy.

Oh! Mom and Dad loved the frog!

Meet The Fockers

Well, Nick and I are off to Iowa. We are taking Mom and Dad's Christmas present to them and it is the first chance for Nick to get to meet my parents.

It should be interesting since I have only been out to them for a year. And since I really didn't "date" women, this is really the first "significant other" of mine they will meet.

On the way to Iowa, we are going to stop at the home of some friends of Nick. I have "met" these folks on-line, it will be nice to actually "meet" them. We are also planning on going to President Grant's home and to the Field of Dreams. And of course, there is also the thousands of places that I love from my childhood. We don't have enough time to do it all, but we will have some fun! I am looking forward to it. And I know Nick is ready for a vacation.

I will post more when we get back!

Sicko

I went to see Michael Moore's new movie, Sicko yesterday. And today, I am living the movie.

The cheapest place I could find generic Welbutrin was Walgreens and that was at $100 for a month. The pharmacist is waiting to see if we may be able to move from Welbutrin to Celexa because Celexa is so much cheaper.

This is probably something that drives Ur-Spo nuts! And I really didn't want to do it but the cost is unreal.

I guess what makes this whole thing so much more upsetting is having just seen Sicko. In it, Moore discusses how countries that have socialized medicine not only have a longer life expectancy, but they also have no medical costs. Wow, no medical costs. No need to worry about going to a doctor. I may actually be able to get some things looked at that I have been putting off.

Oh well, life goes on, huh?

Night

Nights are the worst for me. It is like the minute I lie down, my brain kicks into overdrive. Without the daily destractions, I am more vividly reminded of just how much of a loser I have become. And the problem is, it doesn't appear to be getting any better.

I truly hate what is becoming of my life. I have no energy, I have no direction, I have no desire to do anything. I am awake all day and can't sleep at night. I am 42 years old and am going nowhere. I was going to write "doing" back there, but my fingers started to type "going." What would Dr. Freud say about that?

I fell like I am a burden on society. I feel like I have things to offer, it is just that nobody wants them.

I shouldn't say that because I have Nick, he is what is literally keeping me alive. But is that too big of a burden to place on one person?

I am starting to think about packing. Part of me just wants to pile everything up and move. Staying here is like having a "Good Bye" party and then showing up the next day. It is awkward.

This is like a nightmare that I just can't seem to wake up from.

Rewind One Year

I love this picture, we all look so happy!

I was just remembering that a year ago, I was living through what could be described as one of the worst weeks of my life. And now, a year later, it still kind of hurts.

Nick and I were talking and it is true that this whole trip was pretty much a set up for me to fail. I think about how I travel. I went to Spokane, WA with my car, my tent, my sleeping bag, clothes, and a general direction. I figured I would stay at Devil's Tower and maybe Bozeman on the way there. Otherwise, I had no plans. That is the way I travel. I do not plan trips for nine people! But I was placed in a situation where I was responsible for big plans, even though I told them that planning is not something I am good at.

I guess what I really feel sorry about is that the kids had to feel the tension between the other adult leader and I. Just for those of you who may consider it: don't take a youth group across the country when the other adult thinks you are a screw-up. Believe me, it doesn't work.

I am also sad because it could have been a lot of fun. Even the screw-ups can be fun if you let them. But when you have someone who is uptight and has boundry issues, well...

Oh well, enough for now. I think the neighbors have finally run out of fire works. Macy's claims to have had the biggest fireworks display, but my neighbors were shooting off fireworks for over an hour and a half last night (read: Until 1 am).

ELCA Defrocks Gay Pastor

Well, I guess I got out of the ELCA at the right time!

http://www.reuters.com/article/domesticNews/idUSN0535562920070705

A Flash back you thought you forgot!

Michigan Pride

Yesterday, June 30th was Michigan Pride in Lansing. I am sorry, but none of my pictures turned out. But for the most part, it was nothing really interesting. And in my opinion, that is a good thing. Not that there is anything wrong with people who wish to dress in drag or dress any way they want. What I mean is that we are not something to be frightened of, we are just people like everyone else.

Two of the speakers at the capital were very interesting. The first was a MtoF transsexual who was fired from her position at a local university when she started her transition process. The other speaker was her wife of over 30 years. This courageous woman decided to stay with the person she loved even if it meant that her husband was about to become her wife.

Of course we had all kinds of people telling us we were damned to Hell. Nick and I wanted to stage a scene where we would hear the protesters, have a violent break-up and grab the nearest woman, throw her to the ground and proceed (to a point!) to get jiggy with her! But alas, we didn't do it.

There was a church there that was protesting the protesters! Sometimes I am not as ashamed to be called a Christian.