Saturday, June 24, 2006
Why am I resigning?
The question was asked: Why am I resigning?
Well, I am resigning because I do not want to stay in a church the really does not want me. I could stay in the Lutheran church as long as I was willing to live a lie. But if I want to actually have a life, I cannot be a Lutheran pastor.
I hate having to be paranoid when Nick and I go out, even to something as benign as pizza. I hate having to worry that too many people will see me out with Nick and begin to wonder why "Pastor Ben is never out with girls."
I have hidden so long from myself that I want to quit hiding. I want to be able to be out with Nick in public and not have to worry that someone might see me and begin to talk.
Maybe I should be more forthright, especially during Pride month, but I am not yet ready to become a posterchild for the cause. If things begin to go bad, then I would be willing to put up a fight, but for right now, a quiet transfer would be fine with me.