Well, some wounds have healed, some have not.
I just got back from the beer and pizza party held in my honor by the guys from the Saturday morning Bible study group from my former congregation. It was a good time but it was also difficult. It was hard to talk to people around a table in a restaurant. It was also hard to keep up a smiling face when I was worrying about how to prepare the house to sell. It was nice to see all the people and know that their lives have gone well but it was hard knowing that I was less and less in those lives.
The situations of life have gotten to me lately. I have come to the decision that I will be selling my house. It was a hard decision to make but there really was no other option. I can't make mortgage payments, so moving is the only option.
I am sitting with these people whose lives have gone on pretty much unruffled while my life is falling apart. And what is the difference between us? I love someone who the people who tell me Jesus loves me now says Jesus hates me because I love this person.
At this point, I really don't even know what I want to say.