Thursday, June 27, 2013

The Feeling of Futility

I think that is what I am feeling:  Futility.  I don't think it is depression, as I had previously thought.  I look at the world and think, "Why bother."  Welcome Learned Helplessness!

It has settled into my head that no matter what I do, my situation is not going to change.  Up-date the resume.  Apply.  Pray. "Keep that chin up!" Think positive thoughts.  It all appears to be pure futility.

It is easy to look in from outside and tell me to keep going.  It is easy to say that I have to keep applying.  But I sit here and try to figure why I should even bother.  In the end, it will be all for naught.