Yes, the position that seemed to have it all (literally! Good location, good outreach, good social justice) turned me down. I saw it posted on the church's Facebook page before they informed me. Not necessarily the best way to find out things.
I am getting really tired of this. Digs up all kinds of buried skeletons in my psyche. My father's voice is the loudest with, "You can't do anything right. Everything you touch, you break." So, of course, this is all my fault. My brain just keeps repeating how I am nothing but a failure. I will never amount to anything because I will break anything I touch.
My rational mind tells me that this is all bogus, but the cowering little boy just wants to do something right so daddy will love me.
Yeah, I know, it is three months 'til Christmas. But I am not really excited about that.