Friday, August 21, 2009

Thoughts on the ELCA vote


The Evangelical Lutheran Church in America (ELCA) passed resolutions today committing itself to finding ways to allow churches to "recognize, support, and hold publicly accountable" committed same-gender relationships and also to allow those in committed same-gender relationships to serve as rostered church leaders.


I want to cheer, but I also feel sorry for those to whom this decision brings feelings of pain and abandonment. Believe me, I understand those feelings. I felt them when I signed papers removing myself from the roster because I chose to be true to my life, my partner, and my congregation rather than to lie.

I could have lied. I could have stayed in the church. But what kind of witness was that? It was in being true to the person that I was created to be that I found happiness and life. Not just biological life, but life as a person. I have never regretted my choices, I have only regretted others' reactions to those choices.

Now comes the choice: Do I stay or do I go. Actually, I have already made my choice. I want to return to the ELCA. I feel like I am being ungrateful for wanting to bail, but I have never felt like the Episcopal Church was my home. I appreciate that the ECUSA helped me when I felt abandoned, but I am afraid that I would become resentful by staying.

I pray that the people who are threatening to bail will not. I pray that they may see that God could be moving in a way they are not seeing. Just because we cannot see the hand of God does not mean it is not there. I wish they would stay and add their voice - not stridently screaming - but a voice of challenge.

This opens a whole new chapter. I don't know what is going to happen, only God knows. But a new beginning is underway.

The Vote Passed

It has passed. The ELCA will allow gay pastors.

Thursday, August 20, 2009

Vote Aftermath

You may or may not have felt the earth shake yesterday at around 6:30 pm Eastern Daylight Time. It was at this time that the ELCA voted to accept the Statement on Human Sexuality.

Now, there are cheers and jeers. People are cheering because it passed and people are planning on transferring to other denominations.

The statement needed a vote of 676 to be able to pass by a 2/3 margin. This was not a simple majority here, it needed a supermajority. After the voting buttons had been pushed, the numbers appeared and the number of "Yes" votes was 676! Exactly!

As you can guess, the immediate effect was that the con side wanted to claim that there were problems with the voting equipment.

Why is it that, even after placing stumbling blocks in the way, when the motion passes, it is still seen as a conspiracy? Why can't people believe that maybe the Spirit is at work in the world?

If the motion failed and people left, the liberals would have been considered bad sports at best, and trying to play God as worst. But when the right leaning folks leave, they will consider themselves to be "faithful?"

Why can't we see hate for what it is? Why can't we see that maybe God is trying to teach us that what we are doing is hateful? I don't think the people ARE hateful, but they may be acting in a hateful way.

Oh, and BTW,

Michelle Obama was on VACATION! She can wear shorts. People are just jealous that she looks better in shorts than they do.

Wednesday, August 19, 2009

Saturday, August 15, 2009

We Are Community

The Sunday sermon is here.

Thursday, August 13, 2009

It Seems To Be Pouring

I keep wondering how to make some lemonade out of this whole thing. There must be some way to frame this so that it makes sense.

While I am typing this, one kitty is sitting near me, the other is off somewhere. It is the other that is part of my angst. The other has fecal impaction and has had this problem for four years. The problem is that right now, I cannot afford to take her to the vet to have it treated. Also, this has been going on for over four years and one has to wonder how long to let it go. She requires medication twice a day and this almost always involves a "game" of hide-and-seek. It also makes it difficult to go anywhere because we need to be around to give her the "butt drugs." So I have decided that nine years has been a good long life for my kitty.

Banks are just too much fun to deal with. They remind me of a bully. They look for the first sign of weakness and then exploit it to its fullest potential. Case in point: Because an unexpected payment hit my account before a check cleared, my account went south. The first I heard about this was almost 6 days after it occurred when I got the letter. (I know, I should more closely monitor my account.) The letter said that to cover $77 in NSF, would cost nearly $300! I would have been better off going to a "Predatory Lender!" Since this time, the amount has topped $650.

This, in part, was precipitated by the practice of the church treasurer. She will not give me a check, she must mail it. And she arranges it so that the check will arrive (assuming the US Mail works the way it should) on either the 1st or the 16th of the month. If that date should fall on a weekend, well, "it sucks to be you!" (I will have to say, she did not use those words, but that was the perceived intent.) If the day should fall on Friday, I would not get the check until after work so the money would not become available in my account until almost 5 days after payday. Her comment was that in a business, when it is payday, it is payday. I told her that this is not a business, it is a church. What I can tell is she feels she is doing us a favor and how dare we ask her to do any more. I don't see how giving me the check early would be a problem. She said that I would be cashing the checks early and that is not the way business works. She also said that when you have to write six checks you write them all on the same date. (I am the only check that is needed at the chruch)

When it suites the treasurer, checks can be written earlier. In April, I received both checks for the month on the first of the month because she would be too busy with taxes around April 16th to write the check. I guess when it suites her, I can be very trustworthy.

One of the great problems of this arrangement is that the treasurer has been in church maybe twice in the year I have been here. And her mother is one of the most anxious people I know. Her mother told me to clean my office and would walk into my office and start looking for things. Her mother, working on information I am assuming came from the treasurer, has approached an organist and told me that I better talk to this organist "sooner as opposed to later." Get the treasurer pissed, and it gets played out through the mother. And mom has been part of the congregation since the "glory days." I thought vestry members were supposed to be a living part of the congregation.

The payment that hit my account was a school loan payment. My loans have been in forbearance for two years while I am under employed. Staying in the current situation does not help this situation. But trying to find a job in Michigan is nigh on to impossible.

/rant off
Time to go to my exceedingly *full sarcasm* fulfilling job of making coffee.

Tuesday, August 11, 2009

I Guess This Must Be A Bit Of A Pity Party


I really enjoy Facebook. It is really quite cool. I have been able to get back in touch with many friends. But the other side of the whole thing is being daily confronted with my former classmates from seminary.

I look at them and hear about their lives in their churches. I hear about their vacations and their new houses. And quite frankly, I get really pissed.

I have had another set back with a situation involving a church check that did not clear in time because the treasurer has a freaky control thing and feels the need to HAVE to mail my check to me. When the 1st or the 16th fall on Saturday, that means that it might take up to four days to get the check to clear. Well, you guessed it. I knew this was going to happen, and it did.

But if I did not have to leave the ELCA, I would probably still be in a congregation that could pay me enough so I could be paying my bills instead of putting them in forbearance. I could be doing church things instead of doing coffee things. I could pay to take the cat to the vet instead of trying to get her to crap on her own. (Don't ask.)

I enjoy keeping in touch with my friends, but I also hate it. It is like having salt continually rubbed into my wounds.

Saturday, August 08, 2009

Holy Uncertainty

Sermon for Sunday can be found here.

Saturday, August 01, 2009

Wednesday, July 29, 2009

Sunday, July 26, 2009

Potluck!

Today's sermon is here.

Saturday, July 25, 2009

Five Months!



A little musical interlude to get you in the mood!

Wednesday, July 22, 2009

Double Speak


I just wish people would say what they mean.

I had a situation where someone in my congregation was going to have gall bladder surgery. It was going to be laproscopic surgery and she was going to be outpatient surgery. When she mentioned it, she downplayed the whole thing. I mentioned something to her on Sunday after service that I hope all goes well and to get in touch with me if there is any need. (I am only quarter-time, and she was not making it sound like it was anything big.)

On Thursday, at the vestry meeting, her husband, who is the senior warden of the vestry, said that she was upset that I didn't say anything during the service. In my year at this church, I have never had a special prayer for a person having surgery. Not that it couldn't be done, it just hasn't been in the past.

Suddenly, I am getting "OMG" things from the archdeacon who can't believe that I would "forget" this lady. Remember, this lady downplayed the whole surgery thing and didn't ask that I come to see her before the surgery.

Then I hear, "You need to work on 'connecting' with people" from the senior warden. And when I call the senior warden's wife to see how she is doing, she also says I need to "connect with people."

Huh?

I see people on Sundays and when I run into them in town. I am only quarter time. I don't know what else I should be doing. These people made no effort of inviting me over to their home or finging opportunities to connect. But because I did not do something that they thought that I should, then I was not "connecting."

Please people, be kind to your clergy. They are humans trying to do the best they can. They are not psychic: if you don't tell them, they don't know. They have lives and troubles. They DON'T have "the pastor" to talk to because they ARE the pastor. You are NOT the main focus of their life. They care about you, but there are also things that happen in their lives too.

Monday, July 20, 2009

General Musings


Life has been interesting around here lately.

Some of the more petty annoyances has been putting my phone through the wash. Now I have a Blackberry Pearl, which is fun, but I have to learn again how to use it. But the price was right! $0.99 out of the store! I guess they figure if they get them into peoples' hands, then use will go up. I guess so. All I know is that the gadget geek in me is loving it!

Church has been trying. Actually, work and church has been trying. As I have said before, I feel like I am not doing either job well. I am getting totally sick of the SBX thing and I feel like I am doing a half-fast (say it out loud) job with the church. The whole thing has been popping up feelings that have been buried for years. Memories of being a totally defeated six-year-old have surfaced in all their terrifying glory.

Nick and I have joked about inviting Dr. Ur-Spo up for a visit. He must bring his prescription pad, though.

I have found some more friends on Facebook. This is very cool! I have found a friend that I haven't seen since kindergarten and I have found a friend whom I worked with at camp. The friend from camp was interesting because I have found that he is "family!" Makes me feel less guilty about lusting after him at camp. (DJ, if you are reading this, welcome to my blog!) I find it retroactively comforting to know that I wasn't the only one dealing with conflicted sexuality that summer.

Lots of other things to say, but a little too much wine to make it a fruitful process.

Have a good evening all!

Saturday, July 18, 2009

Friday, July 17, 2009

Wednesday, July 15, 2009

A Church I Can Be Proud Of!

Some great news from the triennial convention. Isn't it interesting that when Christians act like Christians, others who claim to be Christians show their true colors?

(Thansk to Box Turtle Bulletin)

Sunday, July 12, 2009

Weekend Tourists

My aunt and my nephew came to Michigan on a surprise visit. So we had to take them to the best tacky spots around.

Here is me saving Nick in Hell, MI

We are thinking of using this for our wedding invitations.

Nick interviewed for a job in Frankenmouth.

And I tried on a new "hat" at Bronner's. It is interesting what you can do with a Christmas tree and a wreath!

Abundance

This Sunday's sermon is hereser.

Sunday, July 05, 2009

A Biblical Based Marriage

Since I have this Sunday off from the church, I decided to post something to enlighten us all!

Saturday, July 04, 2009

Continuing Saga


Well, I talked to my parents. I dropped the suggestion that Nick and I might be coming to visit and maybe get married while we are there. Mom was not overly exuberant, but she was not against it. I talked to Dad and he was a bit quiet. I asked if he was ok with it. He was quiet. I asked if he needed some time to think about it. He said, "yes," and gave the phone to my Mom.

Mom and I chatted a bit more and Dad decided he would be ok with it.

I told Mom that we didn't care who showed up or not. If they can't deal with it, so be it!

So we are looking at a *cue chirping birds* SPRING WEDDING! We are planning on driving to Iowa in the fall to visit and to begin to make some plans. This way, it gives people some time to get used to the idea. My cousin from Denver already told me that she intends to be there!

I keep forgetting that I have to give people time to get used to the situation. I have been living it for many years, but they are still learning to adjust.

Wednesday, July 01, 2009

Family Homophobia


Well, my charmed homo existence has come to an end.

I seemed to have had the family that most dream of. I came out to them with little or no repercussions. Nick and I went to stay at my parents' house last summer and were allowed to stay in the room in the basement with no problems. As I said, I seemed to have the dream coming out.

But all of that seems to have changed.

I called my oldest sister to discuss a possible wedding since Iowa is more enlightened than the rest of the country, and since my family lives there, I thought it would be nice to share this my family. She seemed strangely distant when I told her but I didn't really put much more thought into it. My sister has always been supportive of me and has always been kind to Nick.

Then the next day, I got a call from my sister. She told me that she thought if I got married, it would kill my dad. That I would be upset when no one showed up at the wedding. And how dare I come there, stir things up, and then leave her to deal with the aftermath.

My sister had never made me feel ashamed before. But at that moment, I was devastated. I was not trying to rabble rouse, I just wanted to share a wonderful part of my life with my family. Was she implying that I should wait until Dad died? I know that people can't hurt us unless we let them, but that really hurt me. I trusted my sister. I feel possibly irreparable damage has been done to our relationship.

I really want to just cut my family off and go on with my life. I know that is not healthy, but ...

My sister married a guy who was a drug addict and was cheating on her. She now lives with a guy even though she claims to be Roman Catholic.

My brother is married to "the nicest manipulative bitch" I have ever met. She does nothing to raise the kids because she is off partying. She won't even visit my parents when my brother comes over.

My other sister married an abusive alcoholic who committed suicide. Then married another good old boy who made us delay the wedding so he could finish his beer.

And me wanting to marry the man I love would kill my father? Oy Vey!

Tuesday, June 30, 2009

Happy Pride Month!

I think Amber should be considered the official "Pride Puppy!"

Monday, June 29, 2009

Random Thoughts

Ok, I am sorry that Michael Jackson is dead. Mainly because I didn't have to hear about him 24/7 before he died.

Do we have to talk everything to death?

Will we be subjected to a 24-hour Billy Mays commercial marathon?

Sunday went well. I had difficulty writing a sermon so I did what I normally don't like to do: I preached off the cuff. It actually went well!

OMG! Ruth Madoff had to give up her limo to take the subway. AND I AM SUPPOSED TO FEEL SORRY FOR HER?

Oh well, gotta go to work. NOT TAKING A LIMO.

Sunday, June 21, 2009

Stormy Weather

Here is the sermon for this Sunday.

Thursday, June 18, 2009

Oh, So Sorry You Had To Wait!

I heard something yesterday morning on the radio that got me angry: One of the reasons that was given for opposing universal health care was that it might cause long waits for service.

This has got to be one of the most elitist reasons I have ever heard! How sad, you might have to wait! But if you have to wait, I may actually get health care! I know I should have things like cholesterol tests and other tests, but I can't afford them. Even waiting in line I can't afford them. So just because you don't want to wait means that I may have to die. (Not trying to be a drama queen, but the truth. My father had his first heart attack at 43.) Because some have good insurance and can afford to get access to the medical industry, others have to go without health care and then show up at the emergency room when the condition reaches a crisis.

Tuesday, June 16, 2009

Random Happenings

Hi all!

I rally haven't been too bloggy lately. I guess I have been distracted.

Things have been happening. I have been dealing with truck problems, church things, work, and Pride month. It has been busy.

Work has been the age old dilemma: I hate working but I love the money. I often want to throw the coffee at the person instead of handing it to them. But I have been restraining myself. There is a twink at work who is a lot of fun to work with. We stand around and rate the guys going through the U-Scan lanes. Actually, the people I work with are nice, a little quirky, but aren't we all?

The truck has been annoying. It has been not wanting to start in the morning. That always makes mornings a thrill. When the truck doesn't work, I get to "enjoy" the mass transit system here. Always way too much fun.

Church has been a combination of good and bad. I love the place and the people. I hate the pay scale! I get stuck working most of my time at SBX and end up feeling like I am shorting the church. I also am not so good a switching gears when I get off of work. I can't come home and just jump into doing church things.

I spoke with the Bishop a couple of weeks ago to see if there is ANYTHING that we can do to move toward being more involved in the church. The big problem is that this cannot be an incremental switch: I can only cut back on SBX hours so much before they will ask if I really want to work there. (Which I don't.) There are some possibilities of doing two-point ministries. Or some other options.

Then there is the possibility of going management at work. This would not be SBX management but management at the store the SBX is in. I have loans that are sitting in forbearance which is nice because I don't have to pay, but not good because the loan keeps getting bigger.

Then there has been discussion of going for a visit in Iowa. Yes, my family lives there, but also laws have changed there! This is all in process right now. Who knows, maybe we will go there and never come back!!!

Pride month has been a bit of a bust. Motorcity in Detroit was way crowded. Michigan Pride in Lansing was a bust. The post-party was nice but small. We will be eating hot dogs and beans for weeks to come.

But, to quote John Cougar Melancamp or whatever his name is, "Life goes on, long after the thrill of living is gone."

Saturday, June 13, 2009

Growing Mustard

The sermon for Sunday is here.

Sunday, May 31, 2009

Speaking In Beef Parts?

Today's sermon is right here!

Tuesday, May 26, 2009

Gnosticism is Alive and...Well?

One of the things that drive me nuts about religion is the whole "oh so holy" thing. What I mean by this is the feeling that "things" have been imbued with God and therefore have to be treated with special reverence. Or the thought that God is kind of dumb so we have to make sure we tell God exactly what we want or God won't get it.

Example 1. I was talking to one of my parishioners. She went rushing into my office (something that pisses me off to begin with) and picked up an old palm that had fallen on the floor. She held it up and asked if it was blessed or not. I said that it was one of the palms that was to be burned for ashes for Ash Wednesday. She was appalled that it was on the floor. So she picked it up and threw it in the garbage can!

Frankly, I think throwing the thing in the garbage is worse than allowing it to remain on the floor. But then again, in my mind, it is just a palm! There is nothing mystical or magical about it. The feeling seems to be that in "blessing the palms" you are imbuing them with a special power or something. Or maybe we are trapping God in the palm.

I have always had a problem with blessing things. I believe in dedication of a thing or place, but actually BLESSING it? No, God blesses people not things. All the bowing and not letting things touch the ground? Seems like idolatry to me.

Example 2. A bunch of papers went up on the bulletin board at the church. I was not asked about this nor was I told what was supposed to happen with these sheets. I eventually was told that they were for a special recognition on memorial day. Ok, sounds good.

I had the sheets with the names brought up and prayed over the sheets. I prayed that God bless and protect those who are named. That God bless and protect all those in the selective services. That God send his peace into the world so that war is no longer necessary. And that God bless all soldiers, no matter what country. I also thanked God for the sacrifices that were made and that were currently being made by the people and their families.

BUT I DIDN'T SAY THE NAMES! People wanted to hear the names! We have to make sure God hears the names or God may forget to bless and protect the people! Oh No! God is so stupid that God does not know whom to look after.

Maybe I am wrong, but it seems odd that we have to tell God whom to bless. It seems to me that the true act of faith is to place ourselves into the care of God and allow God to work through us.

This whole thing felt like an effort to manipulate God through a certain series of actions.

Gnosticism is an effort to manipulate God through secret knowledge and through secret acts. Each of these things seem like an effort to manipulate God. I don't think God cares if the palm was blessed or not. I don't think God cares if the palm is on the floor or not. I don't think God even cares if the palm makes it all the way to the landfill. I don't think God will NOT bless the people just because their name was not read.

Ok, end of rant.

Monday, May 25, 2009

Not Quite Half Way



I've already started to think about Christmas presents, have you?

Saturday, May 23, 2009

Jesus Is Praying For Us

This Sunday's sermon is right here.

Friday, May 22, 2009

Hummers

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A visual representation of my generally prejudiced opinion of the mentality of those who drive hummers.

Wednesday, May 20, 2009

Where Are You?

Ok, I got one of the weirder calls I have received in my clergy career last night:

"Fr. Ben, did you tell anyone to move the church sign?"

"No, why?"

"I just got a call from Mona, she said that the sign has been moved."

"Did it get moved to where we wanted it?" (I asked hopefully.)

"No, supposedly it got moved near the parking lot enterence."

"You mean by the other sign?!?"

"Supposedly, but pointing toward the neighbor's house."

This was something that seminary could not prepare someone for: A phantom sign mover. We wanted to move the sign, but not to the area near the parking lot! Two signs within 15 feet of each other was way too close!

Then, today, I got another call:

"Fr. Ben, are you ready for a laugh?"

"Ok..."

"Mona told me that the new sign is on the left side of the road that leads into the driveway.'

"???!!!!!?"

"I told Mona that that is where the sign had been for the past 20 years!"

That is right! The sign was not moved at all!! You just gotta love life in a small congregation!

Tuesday, May 19, 2009

You see some interesting things at the ol' Bucks. Yesterday was no exception. Tfere was this man who came into the store and started to do scratch-off lottery tickets. After a little while, he would get up, walk away, and then return with more scratch-offs. This continued for over two hours! I wanted to say to him, "Why don't you just give me your money, I will give you 25% back, and you will be about at the same financial level. Then you can go out and enjoy the sun! Or, if you want to waste time indoors, go to a movie! It would be cheeper!

The stained glass is St. Francis. I made him for a friend of mine who has just graduated from seminary. He is a fan St. Francis so I thought it was appropriate.

I still am trying to figure out some way to keep my head above water and still keep my sanity. (What little of it there is.) I have talked about getting my hours reduced at SBUX because I really don't want to ditch the church thing. But keeping the sanity is what is really important. We live in a world that does not value self-care. So when you tell people that you need to do something just because, they tend to look at you funny.

Oh well, life continues on.

Saturday, May 16, 2009

Friday, May 15, 2009

Hopefully Not Crying "Wolf."

exploding church Pictures, Images and Photos
Well, it looks as if I am going to take my place in the secular world.

I was at a vestry meeting last night and pretty much cried the whole way home. Between feeling over extended at work and feeling humiliated by the deacon assisting us, I felt pretty well pummeled by the time the meeting was over. I really don't need this.

I am working almost 40 hours per week at work for $8/hr. Then I work trying to write a sermon. The church I am at has no real prospect of upping my pay to a level that would allow me to ditch the SBUX job and work at the church. And SBUX does not pay enough to allow us to live. I am going to apply for a management position at the store where I work. (I work for SBUX but am hired by a superstore chain.) Hopefully I can get a full-time position and insurance.

I think I have given the church a real shot. But frankly, something has to give and the only thing that seems to be reasonable is the church position.

I guess I am trying to talk myself into believing that this is a good idea. We shall see.

Thursday, May 14, 2009

Updates



Hello all, sometimes I feel like the old Hee Haw song; "If it weren't for bad luck, I'd have no luck at all..."

The radiator is fixed, and that is a good thing. It only cost me $85 and that is also a good thing. Someone from my congregation does handyman work and was able to fix it.

I still need to figure out some way of doing the work that is before me while also taking care of myself. If I don't get enough sleep, decompression time, etc, I get just, as Nick would say, "Whackadoodle." Obviously, being whackadoodle is not a good thing. I need to get through to the lead barrista that I DO NOT need to be working 40 hours per week.

The new location is going ok. Most of the people I work with are nice. One, the "learning coach" (and I use quotes because the girl has not demonstrated any competency in her job) treats me as if any interaction with me is just annoying. I will make a comment and she will just give me a dismissive "ok" and then turn away from me. Thankfully, I don't have to work with her often.

I will be moving my glass stuff to the basement and that will be a nice thing. I appreciate having the place to work on it, but having to drive at least 10 miles to get there waw getting old. Having the stuff in the basement will be nice.

The "Whackadoodle Factor" has been kind of difficult here. I have been feeling totally flawed and unworthy of consuming the earth's resources. I have not been wanting to die, but not wanting to live either. It feels totally confining, caged, and futile.

Saturday, May 09, 2009

Get Out There And Meet Some Weirdos!

This Sunday's sermon can be found here.

Wednesday, May 06, 2009

Don't Even Ask!

The radiator in the truck has sprung a fountain.

Tuesday, May 05, 2009

Pity Party

I haven't been feeling very "blogerary" lately.

The down times lately seem much more prevalent than the up times. I would feel sorry about that, but reading the blog is optional, not mandatory: If you don't like whiny posts, stop reading now.

My biggest frustration is, which seems to be almost always lately, is the feeling of being trapped. I don't have enough psych backing (no Ph.D.) to go into clinical. I don't have a teaching certificate. I have a Masters in psych but that is almost a useless piece of paper. The M.Div. seems to be another useless piece of paper lately; good for answering Jeopardy questions and for getting into arguments with people who have no formal education but KNOW that God is telling them directly. (Gnosticism IS alive and dysfunctional in America.)

I feel like I am not able to give all I can to the church that is financing the major portion of my life and am giving my soul to a store that flips out the word (is it even a word?) "Famliness" whenever they can, but never puts the concept into practice. But they make up the shortfall in finances. And yet, even though they are the minor share of my finances, they take up the major chunk of my time.

I feel stifled in trying to find another job. The job market here is so bad and this job does give me the flexibility I need for the church stuff. But again, I feel guilty at giving the church all I can.

I feel like a house divided: Like I need to pitch one or the other. Drop the church and go after a management position at the store or ditch the store and pray that the church check will cover the finances.

Then we have Nick. He has been such a mainstay in all of this. I know it wears on him too and try to keep the frustrations to a minimum. But life has a way of producing frustrations. Lately, the computer has been a major frustration. First the laptop screen gets broken in an accident of the cd rack falling on it. So we got a monitor on freecycle. Then the power source on the laptop dies. So we replace that. Then the monitor on the desktop dies and we steal the monitor that we got for the laptop. Now we are waiting for the power supply and hoping to find another monitor on freecycle.

But Nick is working in a job that he can do but I am sure is not overly fulfilling. He brings in the lion's share of finances but the thing seems to be a constant source of frustration.

Shouldn't life be more than constant frustration and making do?

I didn't realize when I came to Michigan, now almost 10 years ago, that this place was going to suck me in and pull me down.

Now I need to find a Dr. to help me get the meds that keep me stable but can't afford. (Can't afford the Dr. either.) Of course the Republicans keep telling me that I just need to work harder and then I can be an all upstanding member of society.

Or, maybe I should just deny who I am, enter a loveless marriage, pop out some pups, troll for blow jobs in the rest areas, and call myself a heterosexual.

Saturday, May 02, 2009

We Are All Sheep

This Sunday's sermon is here!

Monday, April 27, 2009

Saturday, April 25, 2009

Thursday, April 23, 2009

Wednesday, April 22, 2009

Fail

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Is this stupidity or a failure of the American school system?

Tuesday, April 21, 2009

Observation


I saw a bumper sticker on the road today, it said, "#1 Spartan Fan!" I had to wonder, "How does that person know that?" Then I had to ask, "Why would a company make bumper stickers or even tee shirts with the '#1' anything on it?" You could only sell one of each!

Do two fathers who both are wearing a "#1 Dad" shirt have to duke it out to settle who truly is THE "#1 Dad"?

Monday, April 20, 2009

Weekend Stuff


I have decided that Nick and I can probably survive anything! This is the third move we have made in as many years. I know we both are getting tired of moving.

Of course, the weather is not cooperating. It was wonderful on Saturday and we got two of the biggest pieces moved, but now it is raining and toting things in the back of a pick-up is not an option. So we switched vehicles. I will be loading stuff into the car and doing the drive.

Sunday went well. I was a bit in a tizzy because everything was all over due to the move. But the people were good about it. I brought the sermon that I was going to preach but decided it was not going to work. So I put aside the just preached off the cuff. Not too bad if I do say so myself.

I preached about how we need to learn to speak to the people in the language they understand. I also talked about how the term "Christian" is getting hijacked and how we are just letting it happen.

Then, more moving.

Saturday, April 18, 2009

I Doubt It!

Sermon for Easter 2 can be found right here!

Friday, April 17, 2009

Why the Teabaggin Won't Work


The more I watch the news about the Teabagging, the more I realize the problem that they had: Nobody read a poem and it was light out.

The more I watch about protest, the more I figure there has to be something magical about bad poetry and candles. I could help the teabaggers by coming up with words that rhyme with "teabagging:"
  • gagging
  • bragging
  • sagging
  • dragging
And, instead of the Iambic Pentameter, how 'bout we do Limericks! Or, maybe we can be like Emily Dickinson and sing all the poems to "The Yellow Rose of Texas."

And people, really, if we don't have candles, how are people supposed to take this seriously! These teabaggings needed to be at night with candles! I know that you all are suffering. You probably had to use Lipton teabags instead of Tazo. But a few candles would have set the mood! Candles, poetry, a little mood music... Those are all things that make for a good teabagging.

But seriously, what is it about bad things happening in our communities that bring out every wannabe poet and causes a run on the Yankee Candle store? We have to have the protest, or vigil, or whatever, at night so that we can play with fire. And the bad poetry, please...

Now for something completely different..

Moving is going well. We are excited about getting to be in a city again. The weather has been cooperating. My cold seems to finally be getting better. Writing a sermon has not been a priority, but something will come together.

Here is hoping all is well in your world.

Thursday, April 16, 2009

New Place

The New Place!!
Not a big kitchen, but bigger than what we have now.

Don't you just love the "Bring the Outdoors Indoors" rail? Hummm..... could the place have been built in the 70's?

And speaking of 70's, don't you just love the built in vanity? This is probably going to become dining central for the critters.

I am able to move because the job has been nuts. The 2nd in command at my old place decided that since another store asked for me, I was GONE! The new store didn't realize that I was immediately released... So I have two weeks off, without pay, to move. It will work.

Boy I hate the previous place I worked!

Sunday, April 12, 2009

Easter Recap

Well, Easter 2009 is fading into the mists of memory...

Actually, the day was quite good. Sunday worship went well. We had a pretty good turn out. (Not as good as Nick had, but close!)

Then I came home and Nick had made a roast. He is such a good cook! It was great! We tried something different this time though, instead of making gravy, we poured the drippings right into the instant potatoes. It wasn't too bad, a little salty, but not too bad. Nick decided to call them "Gravatoes."

Since it was a sunny afternoon, I decided we wanted to do a little geocaching. (Nick was a good sport and went along. I am the one who gets into the high tech hide-and-seek.) So we drove around the countryside trying to find the cemetary so we could find the cache.

Of course, since it was nice, and since neither of us have to work tomorrow, (Nick has a day off, me, that is a whole seperate blog post!) we decided to see what was happening in the world on Easter.

We drove to Hell, MI and found that it was open! Kind of appropriate.

We then went to Ann Arbor to have a beer at \'Aut\ but they were not open.

Now we are finally home and just hanging out.

All in all, it was a pretty good day!

Happy Easter to all!!

Happy Easter!

funny pictures of cats with captions
see more Lolcats and funny pictures

Happy Easter!

Here is the sermon for this Easter!

Thursday, April 09, 2009

Maundy Thursday


I so love my job! I was told that I would be transferring to a new store on Monday. I called the new store to find out about schedules and when I should appear for my first day.

I have just received a call from the new store telling me that they didn't know that I was coming that way. I am not on the schedule. I am not approved to move.

SO

I have no idea what I am going to be doing next Monday. I have tomorrow through Sunday off. Then, who knows??????????

I got off work early today because I still am coughing an hacking. My nose is red and sore and I think I am dehydrating through my nose.

I just love our medical system here in the US. I have no sick days, I have no medical insurance. If I was sick for more than three days, I would have to produce a dr's note. (Dear Mr. Kotter, Please excuse Benton from work today because he is spewing mucus from almost all orifices. Benton's Mother Doctor) Now, to produce this note, I would have to go to the MD (did I tell you that I do not have insurance and would have to fork over $75 for an appt?)to get a note. And because I do not get sick days, I would be out the pay for those days. This whole thing would cost over $200. And this is just for a cold.

Oh, did I forget to mention the verbal "counseling" for not coming to work so I would not spew mucus into everyone's coffee?

Then, last night, Nick woke up at 2 am with burning, itchy, painful skin. We are finding that benedryl is working, but benedryl, and a whole four hours of sleep is not conducive to driving.

So, now I am going to go to Lansing to pick him up and drive him to his church service in Flint. Then tomorrow, we will drive to Lansing so I can get my car and do Good Friday service.

Then comes Easter!

And Monday?? Who knows!

Wednesday, April 08, 2009

Happy Passover

Polling Methods

A friend of mine who lives in Iowa just informed me he got a telephone poll from the office of Congressman Steve King (R-5th Congressional Dist.)

They asked him if he thought marriage should only be between a man and a woman. He said, "No" and they hung up on him.

Accurate sampling methods, huh?

Tuesday, April 07, 2009

Crazy Making


OK, I am about to take the whole management of the store where I work and throw them into the lake and drown them. They are complete idiots!

Case in point: I did not go to work yesterday. I woke up coughing, stuffed nose, and terrible sore throat. My throat was so sore I thought I may have had strep throat. And as I work with food, I decided not going to work was probably a good thing.

So today, even though I didn't feel much better, I decided to go to work because we are short staffed and I also need the bucks. When I got to work, I got called back to the bosses office and was "counseled" for taking off work. I was reminded that by taking off, it puts my coworkers in a difficult situation. To which I agreed.

Now, I need to mention that this is the first sick day I took since I worked at the place. The first sick day in over a year.

When I got back from the "counseling," I was given a paper and asked to read and sign it. On this paper it said that if we had a sore throat with fever, we weren't supposed to come to work!

So, I followed the directives I signed, and I get a mark on my record for it! Like I said, crazy making.

I did find out that my transfer has been approved, so I will be transferring stores next week. This info kind of led me to step out a bit and slam one of my bosses. She deserved it. She has no idea what is going on at Starbucks but will change the schedule when we give it to her. She placed a new person to work alone for four hours and to close alone. This person was not certified and should not be working alone. It is against the contract the store has with Starbucks. This woman is one of the worst managers I have ever dealt with.

Go Vermont!


This just in Vermont overturned the veto! Gay marriage is legal in Vermont! Do I hear the dominoes beginning to fall?

It's Snowing Again


Yesterday I woke up to over six inches of snow. Quite the change from the warmer weather we had been experiencing over the past couple of days. I kind of like days like this because you know that it is not going to stick around for long. It is snowing again this morning, light little flurries.

I am sniffling, sneezing, coughing, and my throat hurts. I took yesterday off and did absolutely nothing. I don't feel much better today, but we cannot afford to have me take another day off. So I am going in at 3 pm today, drugged to the gills. I hope it goes ok.

I do have the Good Friday sermon finished. I need to start working on the Sunday sermon. I cannot reuse one of my past ones because they don't just work. I like some of my past Easter sermons, but I do need to write one for this Sunday. I will have Friday, Saturday, and Sunday off this week so that will be good.

Nick has to do services on Thursday also. I managed to dodge that one.

I feel like I got the whole Holy Week thing backward. Usually you go through the whole thing and then get sick. This year I guess I decided to get sick first!

Sunday, April 05, 2009

He Did It For YOU!

The Good Friday sermon can be found here.

Palm Sunday

Well, now starts Holy Week, the most deadly week for clergy. What is sad is I am going into the week feeling tired. Then add the increased hours at work due to losing coworkers. And trying to get the transfer in place so I don't have to do a ton of driving to get to work. But enough of that.

Today's church service went well. I thought the sermon was ok, but the congregation seemed to really get into it. I had people coming up and thanking me for it. Looking at peoples' faces while I was preaching, I would have thought I was going to get lynched; but I guess it was good.

Moving is happening. Nick and I have been moving things into my office at church, but my office is not very big. I was feeling "boxed in" (yes, that was a pun!) today before service. But at least we are getting the stuff out of the apartment.

We probably won't be doing much moving today. It is supposed to start raining and then snowing. SNOWING??? And not just a little snow: Somewhere between 6 and 10 inches! Oh well, it won't last. Just Winter having one last hurrah.

Well, that is all for today. Have a great Holy Week!

Friday, April 03, 2009

Yeah Iowa!!


Gay Marriage is legal in Iowa!!!

My home state comes shining through in rainbow colors! People think Iowans are backward, but I think we are just well grounded AND visionary.

Thursday, April 02, 2009

Life Mimics April Fools?



I guess maybe I either was too subtle or life is too close to April Fools jokes.

I was joking about quitting. I put the "April Fools!" in the picture to give it away.

What is scary is that when I did get to work yesterday, I found that life was a bit too close to fiction. We did lose another person at work. Then we had a manager saying that having two people who have only been training for a week and two day (respectively) working alone is perfectly ok. People are not supposed to work alone until they have been certified, which may take up to a month. We are all taking a hands-off approach to this. If the management says so, then who are we to tell them they are wrong.

What I also find sad is that in retrospect, the scenario I posted is plausible. What a messed up spot.

Wednesday, April 01, 2009

I've QUIT!


Starbucks has just pushed me too far! I don't know how they expect anyone to work in those conditions. They have fired two more coworkers. We are now down to three employees and two trainees! We cannot leave the trainees alone, so the three of us have to work to not only keep the place going, but to also train the new people. That means NO DAYS OFF! I have to come in on Sundays after church and make sure the close is done properly.

Well, I've had it! There is no way I am going to do it. They can just close the place down for all I care!!

While I am at it, I think I am just going to keep going and move to Montana. The stuff is getting packed anyway!

Sleepless Night

Sleep is not coming easy tonight.

I suffer from the logical error that plagues many with depression: the thought that what is now will be forever. It causes all kinds of problems. It creates a feeling of helplessness that is very difficult to drive away. Also with this thought is the underlying thought of: Is this really worth it?

The thought of "is it worth it" would not be an active suicidal thought, but more a passive feeling. It may be manifested in some lack of attention to detail or a carelessness in critical situations. I also wonder if it manifests as an "accident" to finally push the system to change? This last question is a bit frightening to me. Sometimes I get so overwhelmed that just about anything seems better than what I am doing.

Being tired, unable to sleep, and having a propensity to depression is a bad combination.

Monday, March 30, 2009

No Sermon Sunday


Hey folks! I didn't have to preach this week! I heard on Wednesday that the assistant to the Bishop was going to be at my congregation this Sunday. So that meant that I was not going to have to preach! I don't mind preaching, but when I don't have to, it is a nice break.

We still have been doing pre-moving things. We went to Ikea to find some storage options for the new place. I own dressers, but they tend to be used more as things to keep my clothes off the floor than as a means of storing my clothes. So we are going to try something a little more in keeping with my visual orientation. Ikea had some hanging, open front organizers. This way the items will not just be placed in the drawers and forgotten. I hope this works.

We also went to a gay bar on Friday night and a gay restaurant on Saturday. With the Ikea visit, I think this was quite a rainbow filled weekend!

Some observations of the past week have been license plates. I saw a Mustang driving down the highway. It was nice, a color I wouldn't choose but nice. Then the thing passed me. It had a vanity plate that said, "WAYCOOL" on it. Just let me say, it is not way cool to have to tell people that something is way cool.

Then there was the "mid-life crisis" modile. A corvette was sloloming down the highway. It appeared to be driven by someone in their 50's. Then I noticed the license place: "HAD2HAV." Why did he "HAD2HAV" it? And if he did "HAD2HAV" it, why would I care? And why would he spend extra money to tell me that he "HAD2HAV" it? Did he buy the car so he could enjoy it or so that other people would be jealous of him?

Maybe we need to get the "HAD2HAV" guy and the "WAYCOOL" guy together and see who imploded first from lack of adulation.

Saturday, March 28, 2009

Wednesday, March 25, 2009

Nine Months and Counting!

Santa has been seen hanging out (or should that be "bulging out") at the beach.

Update et al...


Wah! My feet hurt! Things would probably be better if I lost about 75 lbs. Or if I could stop working at Starbucks. Or, better yet, BOTH! But as that is probably not going to happen in the near future, I just get to deal with my feet hurting.

We have a new person at work, and I have been given the task of training her. I guess if you are noisy enough, they give you more work to keep you quiet. But that is ok, this lady is eager to learn and seems like a good worker. Hopefully I can teach her some good habits before she develops the inevitable bad ones.

At work the other day, I saw an older guy, probably in his 70's, with a jacket on that said "Viagra" in huge letters on the back. I wondered why someone would want that on their jacket, but then figured if you are 70 and can get it up (by whatever means) it must pay to advertise!

I entered two pieces in the Delphi Art Glass Festival this year.

The first is the DaVinci Chic

The other piece is the Cat Clock.


This is the competition that I entered last year and won second and third place in my category, suncatchers.

I am not hopeful of winning any awards this year. The competition is tough. But it is still fun to have my pieces in a public show.

You know, you never know how much you look at a clock until it is gone. Since the cat has been gone, both Nick and I have commented on looking at the wall and being frustrated that the clock is not there. So to remedy the problem, a new clock has been made:


Not a whole lot, but it works. Nick jokes that we will eventually have a clock for every season! Not a bad idea if you ask me. I was surprised how hard it is to draw an egg that looks like an egg. Then, of course, trying to draw the stripes so they work. Oh well. It is difficult having an imagination that surpasses my drawing abilities. It is not wonderful, but it is seasonal and it works.

Wednesday, March 18, 2009

Life 20 Minutes From Hell


Well, the packing for the moving has started. I hate moving and Nick hates it even more. But I think moving will be a good thing. Getting closer to Nick's job and closer to my church will be helpful. I know I am looking forward to being back in a metropolitan area. It will be nice to be able to go to a gay bar and not have to drive 40+ miles.

There is a "Cheers" type of bar in town. This is kind of my speed. I am not, and never have been, into the big pick-up bar scene. The only thing wrong with this place is they don't have a dart board. Well, we'll have to change that!

My congregation is so excited about having me move closer. They are taking a free will offering this Sunday and next Sunday to help pay moving expenses. I was very humbled to think that in this time of difficulties, people are willing to help. And they are also looking to increase my pay so that I will be able to attend vestry meetings. I am happy to see that they are taking the initiative.

We have gotten a new boss at work. He seems to need to relax his sphincter muscle. He already has gotten the bakery angry with him and is doing his darnedest to make us angry. Our second in command is also working hard to make life difficult: the lead barista sends the schedule and no. 2 changes it. Yesterday I was scheduled to work alone from 3:30 until 7:30 alone. Today, my coworker is scheduled to work from 5:30 until noon alone.

Oy vey!