Angie's Is Open in Coral

I wanted to ask, “Ok, where is the camera hidden?”

For months, Nick and I have seen these signs all over the place stating, “Angie’s Is Open In Coral!” Now when I say all over the place, I mean even where two roads cross in the middle of a bunch of fields, there is a sign. And not just one sign on an intersection, multiple signs.

So, Nick and I decide to go to Angie’s for a late lunch, early dinner after moving a bunch of Nick’s stuff. I had driven through Coral earlier that day and saw a 5 ft. chalkboard telling that Angie’s had all you could eat fish for $4.50. We both thought this was a good deal so we went inside.

I should have just turned around and left upon entering. The place was dark and smelled of smoke. It reminded me of my Grandma’s kitchen but not nearly as welcoming. There was a sign over the cash register which said, “All You Can Eat Fish, $4.50. In the middle of the room was a table with a young girl and a little baby and a woman that I can only describe as a crone. The crone was smoking. There was a plasma screen TV along the far wall among stacked Christmas decorations. On the TV was the National Geographic show, “In the Womb Animals.” The show was dealing with the gestation and birth of an elephant. (Watching 250 lbs. of slimy baby elephant emerging from mama elephant’s nether regions really makes for a wonderful dining experience.)

We found a table as far as possible from the chimneys, which was hard considering they were sitting in the middle of the room. We sat down and the waitress came over and asked us what we would like. We both ordered the All You Can Eat Fish. We were both told that, “We only have that on Friday night.” We were then told if we would like it, the waitress guessed they could make some for us. We both decided to order from the menu.

I will have to say that the wet burrito I ordered and the chicken strips and fries Nick had were good. And for the price, it wasn’t too bad. But when one of the customer’s began to speak to us and I felt like it was Boomhauer from “King of the Hill,” I knew it was going to be the last time I went to Angie’s.

It was real, and it was fun, but it wasn’t real fun.

But I did learn that a baby elephant’s toe nails become soft before it is born so that it doesn’t rip up its mother’s birth canal. Now, you couldn’t have had lunch without knowing that!