Kitty Love

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Potluck!

Today's sermon is here.

Five Months!

A little musical interlude to get you in the mood!

Double Speak

I just wish people would say what they mean.

I had a situation where someone in my congregation was going to have gall bladder surgery. It was going to be laproscopic surgery and she was going to be outpatient surgery. When she mentioned it, she downplayed the whole thing. I mentioned something to her on Sunday after service that I hope all goes well and to get in touch with me if there is any need. (I am only quarter-time, and she was not making it sound like it was anything big.)

On Thursday, at the vestry meeting, her husband, who is the senior warden of the vestry, said that she was upset that I didn't say anything during the service. In my year at this church, I have never had a special prayer for a person having surgery. Not that it couldn't be done, it just hasn't been in the past.

Suddenly, I am getting "OMG" things from the archdeacon who can't believe that I would "forget" this lady. Remember, this lady downplayed the whole surgery thing and didn't ask that I come to see her before the surgery.

Then I hear, "You need to work on 'connecting' with people" from the senior warden. And when I call the senior warden's wife to see how she is doing, she also says I need to "connect with people."

Huh?

I see people on Sundays and when I run into them in town. I am only quarter time. I don't know what else I should be doing. These people made no effort of inviting me over to their home or finging opportunities to connect. But because I did not do something that they thought that I should, then I was not "connecting."

Please people, be kind to your clergy. They are humans trying to do the best they can. They are not psychic: if you don't tell them, they don't know. They have lives and troubles. They DON'T have "the pastor" to talk to because they ARE the pastor. You are NOT the main focus of their life. They care about you, but there are also things that happen in their lives too.

General Musings

Life has been interesting around here lately.

Some of the more petty annoyances has been putting my phone through the wash. Now I have a Blackberry Pearl, which is fun, but I have to learn again how to use it. But the price was right! $0.99 out of the store! I guess they figure if they get them into peoples' hands, then use will go up. I guess so. All I know is that the gadget geek in me is loving it!

Church has been trying. Actually, work and church has been trying. As I have said before, I feel like I am not doing either job well. I am getting totally sick of the SBX thing and I feel like I am doing a half-fast (say it out loud) job with the church. The whole thing has been popping up feelings that have been buried for years. Memories of being a totally defeated six-year-old have surfaced in all their terrifying glory.

Nick and I have joked about inviting Dr. Ur-Spo up for a visit. He must bring his prescription pad, though.

I have found some more friends on Facebook. This is very cool! I have found a friend that I haven't seen since kindergarten and I have found a friend whom I worked with at camp. The friend from camp was interesting because I have found that he is "family!" Makes me feel less guilty about lusting after him at camp. (DJ, if you are reading this, welcome to my blog!) I find it retroactively comforting to know that I wasn't the only one dealing with conflicted sexuality that summer.

Lots of other things to say, but a little too much wine to make it a fruitful process.

Have a good evening all!

It Is Ok, You Can Sleep Through This One

The sermon for Sunday is here.

LOVE IT!

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A Church I Can Be Proud Of!

Some great news from the triennial convention. Isn't it interesting that when Christians act like Christians, others who claim to be Christians show their true colors?

(Thansk to Box Turtle Bulletin)

Weekend Tourists

My aunt and my nephew came to Michigan on a surprise visit. So we had to take them to the best tacky spots around.

Here is me saving Nick in Hell, MI

We are thinking of using this for our wedding invitations.

Nick interviewed for a job in Frankenmouth.

And I tried on a new "hat" at Bronner's. It is interesting what you can do with a Christmas tree and a wreath!

Abundance

This Sunday's sermon is hereser.

A Biblical Based Marriage

Since I have this Sunday off from the church, I decided to post something to enlighten us all!

Continuing Saga

Well, I talked to my parents. I dropped the suggestion that Nick and I might be coming to visit and maybe get married while we are there. Mom was not overly exuberant, but she was not against it. I talked to Dad and he was a bit quiet. I asked if he was ok with it. He was quiet. I asked if he needed some time to think about it. He said, "yes," and gave the phone to my Mom.

Mom and I chatted a bit more and Dad decided he would be ok with it.

I told Mom that we didn't care who showed up or not. If they can't deal with it, so be it!

So we are looking at a *cue chirping birds* SPRING WEDDING! We are planning on driving to Iowa in the fall to visit and to begin to make some plans. This way, it gives people some time to get used to the idea. My cousin from Denver already told me that she intends to be there!

I keep forgetting that I have to give people time to get used to the situation. I have been living it for many years, but they are still learning to adjust.

Physics Lesson For The Day

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Family Homophobia

Well, my charmed homo existence has come to an end.

I seemed to have had the family that most dream of. I came out to them with little or no repercussions. Nick and I went to stay at my parents' house last summer and were allowed to stay in the room in the basement with no problems. As I said, I seemed to have the dream coming out.

But all of that seems to have changed.

I called my oldest sister to discuss a possible wedding since Iowa is more enlightened than the rest of the country, and since my family lives there, I thought it would be nice to share this my family. She seemed strangely distant when I told her but I didn't really put much more thought into it. My sister has always been supportive of me and has always been kind to Nick.

Then the next day, I got a call from my sister. She told me that she thought if I got married, it would kill my dad. That I would be upset when no one showed up at the wedding. And how dare I come there, stir things up, and then leave her to deal with the aftermath.

My sister had never made me feel ashamed before. But at that moment, I was devastated. I was not trying to rabble rouse, I just wanted to share a wonderful part of my life with my family. Was she implying that I should wait until Dad died? I know that people can't hurt us unless we let them, but that really hurt me. I trusted my sister. I feel possibly irreparable damage has been done to our relationship.

I really want to just cut my family off and go on with my life. I know that is not healthy, but ...

My sister married a guy who was a drug addict and was cheating on her. She now lives with a guy even though she claims to be Roman Catholic.

My brother is married to "the nicest manipulative bitch" I have ever met. She does nothing to raise the kids because she is off partying. She won't even visit my parents when my brother comes over.

My other sister married an abusive alcoholic who committed suicide. Then married another good old boy who made us delay the wedding so he could finish his beer.

And me wanting to marry the man I love would kill my father? Oy Vey!